If you find yourself struggling with the decision whether or not to do a first look, here are some pros and cons of a first look and some things to think about:

PROS TO A FIRST LOOK

• Because you get to see each other much earlier in the day, it can calm nerves and anticipation.

• It’s a great, private opportunity to see each other without worrying about the reactions of others.

• It gives you an opportunity to have a truly private moment to talk, exchange gifts, or make vows to each other that are too intimate or emotional to make at your ceremony.

• It allows you to have a later start to the day, scheduling your ceremony start time in the late afternoon or early evening.

• Most of your photos are done prior to the ceremony (assuming you do wedding party and family photos following the first look), when everyone’s hair and makeup are still fresh.

• Your cocktail hour can be shorter, avoiding the possibility of guests over indulging at the bar or becoming bored.

• You and your spouse can likely join cocktail hour, which gives you a chance to greet and chat with guests.

"When I was getting married, I felt the weight of deciding which wedding traditions to incorporate. In the end, my husband and I had a pretty non-traditional wedding (Sunday brunch, then the ceremony, then a cocktail hour with a live jazz band), and it was everything we wanted it to be. We were creative with our timeline and format to work within our budget, and even now (MANY years later!), we wouldn’t change a thing.

One item we went back and forth on, was whether or not to do a first look. Ultimately, we did see each other before the wedding, but I was in a sundress and he was in a casual outfit, because I DID want to have that ‘wow!’ moment at the end of the aisle. The photo we have of that moment is one of my favourites, because it shows the raw emotion that my husband felt in that instant. (However, he hates it, because he’s trying to fight back tears!)."

CONS TO A FIRST LOOK

• You may encounter resistance from older friends or family who are more traditional.

• You may have to start getting ready earlier in the morning.

• Depending on the season, and the time of your ceremony, you may find that you’re doing first look photos right in the harshest and hottest sunlight of the day.

• Your clothes may become soiled pre-ceremony.

• You may need a hair and makeup touch-up pre ceremony (particularly if there are tears!)

• Because you’ve already seen each other (and family may have seen you too), the intensity of your reactions during the ceremony may be reduced.

• You will likely still need to do some extended family photography following the ceremony.

ALTERNATIVE TO A FIRST LOOK

If you really want to stick with the traditional ‘end of the aisle’ first look, but want to have some connection with your spouse-to-be prior to the ceremony, consider doing a first ‘non’ look, or a ‘first touch’. This is where you position yourselves around a corner, or on either side of a door, allowing you to talk to and perhaps hold hands with your fiance(e), exchange vows, words of encouragement, and even perhaps exchange gifts, but you don’t see each other, preserving the traditional ceremony first look experience.

Ultimately, there are tons of factors to consider when determining when to see each other first on the big day. Have an open and honest conversation with your partner, and decide what’s best for YOU - don’t let anyone else’s opinions sway your decision. Cheers and best wishes to you on your wedding day, no matter what you choose to do!

FIND OUT MORE ABOUT UNMISTAKABLY YOU | To speak with Unmistakably You about your wedding options, you can reach them using the form below.